DJ CRAZYCHAN

It’s the fucking American corn conspiracy! Let’s restate some facts: American corn is subsidized by the government, corn in America is mostly genetically modified, GMO’s are destroying the health of all Americans.
Are you ready for more? Here it goes, because corn is subsidized farmers make more money growing corn more than wheat. Right now corn has even more government incentives, because of the U.S.’s ethanol production as an alternative fuel. What does this mean Chanman, you ask? Well farmers are switching from growing wheat to corn. Which means that we have a wheat shortage. In the past couple of years wheat has gone from 9 dollar a bag to 45 dollars a bag. That is a fucking 500% increase. It rising faster than our fuel prices! If you did not already notice, everything that contains wheat is rising in price. Even my Ambrosia, BEER! That is not the end of it. Because all of our corn is going to ethanol, the corn for human consumption cost more. Here’s another fact, a large percentage of Latin America’s corn is exported from the U.S. but since we’re using it for fuel, they are going hungry. If you ask me that’s gonna mean more illegal immigrants(note: I have no problem with immigrants). Here’s another fact, ethanol has less BTU’s than gasoline so it requires more of it to travel the same distance. That means more out of your pocket. Another fact, corn is not the best way to make ethanol, it takes more energy to produce than it can put out(Harvard research study 2007) So why are they using corn? BECAUSE IT’S FUCKING SUBSIDIZED BY THE GOVERNMENT. It all comes down to the mighty dollar…… Can you imagine it? The future! A world of famine, disease and hunger.

Right now at this very moment my eyes are half closed and for some unknown reason my mind is fighting the sandman. Insomnia at 3 am has provoked me to write the first part of my story. It’s not gonna be very long cuz I can’t think very well right now. So here’s an intro to the story of my struggle.
AWESOME! Look at all the colors!!! What? who’s that? where’s that? was that a ghost? How much can I do before I O.D.? You don’t know? Well let’s find out? WHAT? combining drugs is gonna kill me? Whatever! lemme try it and I’ll be the judge of that. One more is not gonna hurt me. Who do you know? Who can I call? Hook me up man! Is it 2am already? Damn It! That was some good shit!….. Three days later I wake up with no pants, porn blasting on the computer and I’m under the fucking bed. In a semi conscious state I ask myself “Where the fuck am I?” I get up look at myself in the mirror and think “The dragon has got me how do I escape?”

In my new quest to become a better writer, I’ve decided to Chronicle my battle with addiction which is still going on right now.

Hold on and never let go. These are the 6 words that represent my life. Although there is very deep meaning in this I will only touch on freedom. Particularly what makes me feel free. Which is riding and climbing. It’s my tunnel vision, it’s my meditation and my own religion. When I ride I hold on and let the world take me. It’s absolute freedom, the wind is in my hair, the sun is at my back and there are no rules no restrictions, just ride. Ride long, ride fast and ride hard. When I climb a rock there is something almost Zen about it, there is only two things in the world just you and the rock. The only thing I think about is how to get to the top and never let go. It’s almost a metaphor for life. Now will you come along and ride with me on this fantastic voyage?

Now I’m a little buzzed right now so excuse any misspellings…. Well I misspell stuff all the time anyways……

GMO’s GMO’s GMO’s! A few years ago I would of told you an uneducated theory about them. I would of told you that they are necessary for the world’s ever increasing population. They are resistant to disease, grow fast, resistant to drought, taste good, they’re asthetically better and are rich in nutrients. Guess what I was fucking wrong! I belived all the media hype. Yes I admit it I was a drone, but now I know the truth.
This is the story of High Fructose Corn Syrup. Yes, you heard it right, a product that’s in almost everything we eat. So you ask now what’s wrong with sugar Chanman? Well that question is the first thing wrong with it. The first thing is that it is not real sugar. It’s not the table sugar we’re all thinking about. It comes from geneticaly modified corn, corn that’s been modified to be sweeter. That same modification has altered the way our bodies metabolize it. Most of the time someone thinks about sugar, they think about the rush they get when they eat it. This is not the case with HFCS. Our bodies metabolize it in the liver. The process begins with the liver turning it into trigylcerides (which is fat) and it alters the way we produce insulin, which is escenssial to the way we metabolize blood sugar. So that makes it a double wammy! We get fat and we become diabetic. Well I’ll admit that you have to be genetically prone to diabetes to become diabetic, but this accelerates it. Why do you think America has the highest percentage of diabetes in the world? The EU has already banned GMO’s and america is fat and diabetic. You may think that there is not that much HFCS in your food. I’m gonna prove you wrong. In one pack of ketcup from Mcdonald’s is one table spoon of HFCS. In Yoplait yougurt, which is product that’s marketed as healthy there is 10 table spoons of HFCS. Remember the last time you put 10 table spoons of sugar in your coffee? It was like a sugar explosion!
FUCKING CHEW ON THAT!
Let’s see how far we’ve come.

I’m not really a fan of Klondike bars but I would steal one from Neil

Facebook is one of the most ridiculous sites ever. What good is it for? Why would anybody want to superpoke? What the fuck is superpoke anyway. How come so many people like it? I really do not understand. It’s like that site was thought up by a third grader or worse yet some geek that’s been living in a cave who thinks text games are still the greatest thing since sliced bread. To me the only thing it’s good for is inviting friends to events. That’s it! You can do that with a phone or email anyways. I have a real life that has nothing to do with superpoking or writing on your wall.
Some of you would say that myspace is a ridiculous site too. I could not agree with you more that myspace is a fucking retartded social networking site. People spend too much time “pimping out” thier pages. I’m so sick of thanx for the add comments. I use myspace for two things only: again one of them is to invite my friends to events, the other is music.
Myspace does an incredible job promoting independent bands. So good in fact that they have their own tour and record label. If you’re sick of the bullshit that clearchanel and the rest of big radio puts on the air then myspace music is a godsend. Two of the best shows I’ve ever seen was discovered on there.
In closing, all social networking site SUCK! But myspace music rules!

A few months ago I had this incredible moment of clarity where I finally understood everything in my world.
When I woke up this morning, I thought about the book “The Omnivore’s Dilemma”. First I have to say I never read the book, I’ve only heard about it. It talks about factory farming and corn. It’s one of the biggest conspiracies ever. During world war two, the government started subsidizing corn, so that we have a food supply. That subsidy still exist today. Think about it, a subsidy that was meant for wartime in the 30-40’s is still in effect. So farmers have mucho incentive to grow more that we actually need, cuz they get paid for it. NO MATTER WHAT! So what do we do with all this excess corn? We feed it to cows. That sounds all fine and dandy except that cows are not designed to eat corn! And it’s genetically modified corn. Now you ask what does this all mean Chanman? It means everything. It means you have been lied to. It means that beef if no fucking good. It means that beef is contaminated. When cows eat that it puts their bodies under unneeded stress, which leads to beef with excess saturated fat which leads to heart disease and obesity. Why do yo think that we’re so fat here in America? I haven’t even talked about the Arse end of it. When cows secrete this GMO, hormone and antibiotic enriched diet, their waste is considered hazardous. So what do farmers do with it you ask? They build a lagoon of course. And when these lagoons leak (which happens very much) I destroys agricultural land and contaminates our water supply.
What does that mean? That means that we are fat now but if this continues we will be hungry tomorrow. We will not have enough land to grow food and we will not have enough water.
FUCKING CHEW ON THAT!
Let’s see how far we’ve come.

The last show in February was the ultimate drug cocktail for us perpetually fun addicted warriors. And United by sound is back again Tuesday night at the elbo room. Be ready to rock! It’s trip hop meets rock meets pop, meets arggh! It’s like David Koresh, hear them once and you’ll be blindly following them like a cult. Mere words cannot describe their musical manifestation of greatness, just think of them like the matrix you have to see them to believe. Get there early cuz it’s gonna sell out fast. Be there or be square

Check them out here:
http://www.myspace.com/unitedbysound
http://www.unitedbysound.net/

4/1 The Elbo Room in SF w Little Dragon
4/2 Mercury Lounge in Goleta w Little Dragon
4/4 The Knitting Factory in Hollywood w Pigeon John and Abstract Rude
4/5 Velvet Jones in Santa Barbara w Pigeon John and 2Mex